Happy birthday Patsy!

So today is my lovely wife's birthday. Let me just say that I have a wonderful and amazing wife! Generally speaking she is the cautious and careful one, while I am the adventurous and cavalier one in our marriage. Yet she still prayerfully goes along with my ideas for our life, which are sometimes harebrained! I will say that she has taught me to plan, pray and consider much more than I am naturally inclined to. She also has a wonder for life that adds such a dimension to our non-conformist way of living! God knew what He was doing when He brought us together.

We have so many wonderful experiences in life as we have blended our strengths together. Celebrating her birthday in an RV is our newest one! What fun this will be as we party in Howard! No I am not baking her cake, I am buying her one. But this is no different than I have ever done. The one thing I wish I could give her this year that I can't - a nice hot and quiet bath all to herself. You know "Calgon take me away." I guess she'll have to enjoy the hot, quiet shower this year.

This picture we took yesterday at the Fort Worth Water Gardens. She is pretty amazing girl, more beautiful with every passing day.

Marital bliss

Marriage gets some pretty rough treatment these days. Either people don't want to get married, they try to change God's definition of marriage, or they forsake marriage all together! We were watching the Closer the other night and Lt. Flynn was trying to tell Lt. Provenza that getting married leads to murder!!

Well as I celebrate 15 years of marriage I can tell you that marriage rocks. I love being married! Maybe I am one of the fortunate ones though, I was blessed with an amazing wife! Yes we get on each other's nerves from time to time and we even fight, but I could never imagine life without my wife Patsy. So in that spirit and my affection for top 10 lists I am presenting the top 10 best things about getting married (Warning this may be rated PG 13).

10. Two minds are better than one - when you have a problem another perspective and set of eyes can really help you solve it!

9. So much warmer on cold nights to snuggle with your hunny!

8. More earning power. Whether it be taxes or income or the ability to save money, two people can earn more than one. Yes the expenses are higher, but not in proportion.

7. A happily married couple makes for the best greenhouse to raise well-adjusted kids. Stats continue to overwhelmingly bear this out despite what you might see in popular culture.

6. Face it married people have way more sex than single people, even for those who have no morals!

5. A three-prong cord can never be broken, husband, wife and God together can do the impossible.

4. There is always someone who is on your side. Even when they have to help you see the other side's point of view.

3. When you're sick, you have someone to make you soup and let you sleep.

2. Marriage is one of God's best ways to sharpen us and mold us into His image, if we let Him, of course. Marriage serves as a mirror into our soul, if we are willing to look there. A good marriage should bring us closer to the point of the death of our self.

1. God created marriage before the parenthood, the church, and all other institutions. Marriage was here before taxes, football, Walt Disney World, the Bible, sin, death, pain, the United Nations and is a fixture of every culture in the world. It is one of His greatest gifts to humans, and it helps us become less selfish and self-centered, if we let it change us. It is a picture of God's relationship with His people.

A Whole Nother Story

It's been awhile, but it is time for another Martin family book review. This time we look at a quirky title, A Whole Nother Story, by a quirky author, Dr. Cuthbert Soup. Once again these are based on a five star rating. Be sure to check out other reviews (look at the labels to the right or at the bottom of this post for Martin Family book reviews).

Tanner 5 stars. It was absolutely hilarious.

Blake 4 stars. I laughed a ton, but there were some places that were depressing

Patsy 4.5 stars. The only thing that was funnier than the story was the unsolicited advice at the end of each chapter.

Marty 4 stars. Be careful when you read this if you are drinking milk. You might squirt some through your nose you'll laugh so hard! Parents of the Christian faith might need to talk through a couple of elements with their kids, like a psychic dog and a fortune teller. Otherwise the message is very positive!

Shaving cream homeschool b

In homeschooling you can also quickly and nimbly adapt to a child's learning styles (like if one finds shaving cream messy on his hands).

Shaving cream homeschool

One of the beauties of homeschooling is that if a child is struggling with a concept you can revisit that concept over and over again and find different ways to teach that same concept until it sinks in! You can also move on quickly with concepts that are quickly learned, not lingering too long on something so the child bores of school.

A little slice of Americana

There are lots of things I love about living in a little town like Cambridge. Sure you have to drive 15 minutes to a Walmart or to see a movie or to go to a nice restaurant (We do have a Subway and Dollar General in Cambridge though!). Yes sometimes the locals are a little suspicious of you, but here in Cambridge that is really not a big issue, unlike the city 1o miles to the north.

But all that is more than worth the trade off for me. I love sitting on the back porch working and hearing nothing but the cicadas and a dog barking somewhere in the distance while my kids play in the sprinkler (it is what I am doing now). I love how you can see so many stars at night and how you can tell your kids they can ride their bike or walk to the town park. I love how we have tons of flat sidewalk on our street to teach our youngest guys to ride without training wheels. I love how when you walk in the evening down the road the people you pass give you the pointer finger wave (almost a salute from the forehead).I love the small town newspaper that has a picture of your kid in it about a dozen times a year (I used to be the editor of this paper many years ago).

Today was another example of what I love about small towns. Today we went to "downtown" Cambridge for the Antique tractor show. We walked while the little guys rode in the wagon. We saw the old tractors and semi trailers and antique small engines (one of them was making "wooden nickels that some of the boys got to keep.) The three youngest sons got to participate in the pedal tractor obstacle course, where they each won a ribbon some animal crackers and a toy! There was face painting, a used everything sale and of course my wife had to stop by the library for the used book sale (she got 20 for $2). Besides the book the only real money we spent was for some ice cream and a couple of items we bought at the used whatever sale (some organization things we will use in the RV).


Everyone should live in a small town at least once in their life. It's a slice of what has made America a great nation and in some ways we all need to recapture as a nation some of the simpler things that help bring people together.

Sunset the albino ball python

Tanner got his wish of a snake for his 11th birthday! His Aunt Sue had nursed back to health an albino ball python and gave it to him! It is a lot bigger than Slidey, his old corn snake (it escaped at the hands of a little brother a couple of years ago). Now we have special clips for Sunset the python's home.

Our first day in Disney - I am already Disney homesick

The sound of the vacuum cleaner....

Another post on family life by Patsy

There is something slightly comforting about the sound of the vacuum cleaner running. Maybe it’s the fact that it’s constant humming drowns out the sounds of the ringing telephone, the way too loud Sponge Bob episode on TV, or the screams from children fighting over the same toy. Anyway, I find it somehow soothing. It can be pleasant to lose yourself in the relative peace of the soft pings and tinks as the vacuum picks up the occasional stray object. One can revel in the knowledge that not only are you grabbing a few quiet moments, but you are also keeping your home “Good Housekeeping” clean. I never mind vacuuming….at least I didn’t…until we became dogless.
I sense confusion, dear reader. Can it be that you do not comprehend the connection between the family dog and the peace of the gentle vacuum sounds? Allow me to enlighten you. You see, while we had a dog, I could vacuum the entire house listening to the gentle sounds of the carpets being cleaned. However, the first time I vacuumed under our dining room table after our dog was gone, I was forced to face a very grim reality. The soft pings and tinks of the vacuum doing it’s job suddenly became loud and continuous thunks and rattles. There was debris in mass quantity under my table! In short, there was enough food under there to feed a third world country! While our dog Tucker was alive, I was happy living in total denial believing that my children were at least eating some of the healthy foods that were placed before them. Now, I was being forced to look at my sons in a very different light. Those little stinkers had been passing their unwanted food to the dog for years!
Believe me, I have been the recipient of whinning and complaining comments about my food for years. I am under no delusion as to my children’s abhorance of healthy green vegetables and low fat meats. I am also completely comfortable in my ability to cook good tasting food. My skills are not in question. It is their taste buds that are to blame. No, it is not the shock of finding they had not wanted their food that caught me by surprise. It was the knowledge that they had somehow gotten the food from their plates to the floor without being caught that really caused me some trepidation. Were my children really this good at deception? I didn’t know whether to applaud their slight of hand, or discipline their unethical disposal of perfectly good food.
I am no stranger to the picky-eater. I had a very good friend whose son would only eat yogurt and cheese sticks. He might occasionally eat a few potato chips dipped in ketchup, but that was it. And definitely no peanut butter! I once tricked him into tasting a peanut butter and jelly sandwich by telling him it was a PBJ. He took a bite, swallowed and said, “Not too bad”. That was until his older brother explained to him that PBJ stood for peanut butter and jelly. He proceeded to throw up. That was the day I learned a very valuable lesson…..always work alone. Of course the whole situation was a little more comical because the boy’s mother was a nutritionalist.
At that time, my first son was just a toddler and I had no real idea of the problems that awaited me. He became a picky-eater the day he started to actually chew food. OK, that does sound a little strange, but he really wouldn’t eat anything that took too long to chew. That pretty much narrowed down the meat choices for him. Hotdogs were OK, hamburger was not. In fact, we have been known to ask for a cheeseburger without the meat at fast food restaurants. (It’s funny…they never believe you the first time you ask for that, and they always give you a slight smile as they repeat your order back.) Of course, as he grew, he learned to eat a wider variety of meats. He now eats cheeseburgers with the meat, but not much else.
One of my adopted sons had a hard time eating any vegetable and could not stand the idea of someone else holding a spoon anywhere near his mouth. The first night we put our “foot down” and actually required him to eat his vegetables is now known in our family as the “green bean incident of 2007”. He was amazing in his perserverance. The child actually held one green bean in his mouth for 45 minutes without chewing or swallowing. I’m not really sure if we can completely claim victory in the green bean showdown, because he never actually “ate” the thing. He just held it in his mouth until a little trickle of green drool started running down the side of his mouth. Finally, I think it just mixed with his saliva and he swallowed it accidentally. It’s a sweet little family memory that we will always cherish.
I have a son that will eat mostly meat, but not much dairy; a son that will eat all dairy and bread, but not much meat; sons that eat a huge breakfast of any kind, but not much supper; and one who can’t seem to find a food he doesn’t like. As long as it is well known that I am not a short-order cook, and everyone must eat their vegetables, I can live happily in total oblivion. But now, I have come to the realization that my “happy place” of ignorance is being threatened. I can see that I have only two options open to me…either get another dog, or stop vacuuming under the dining room table. I wonder how long it takes for food to bi-degrade on it’s own……

Milestones

I recently crossed over the 40 milestone in my life. Brendan also turned 4 in December and now my father-in-law John Huene is turning 80 this month. So all these neatly aligned milestones got me thinking about the big differences between four, forty and eighty. Here are a few I observed.

Teeth: Brendan wants to loose his, I'm trying to keep mine and John has already lost his!

Drinks: Brendan loves Kool-aid, I love Dr. Pepper (non-diet) John loves Ensure

Naps: Brendan doesn't want take them, I wish I could take them and John can't help but take them

Books: Brendan likes large pictures, I like large novels and John likes large print

Favorite actor: Brendan likes Spider Man, I like Harrison Ford and John likes John Wayne

Favorite food: Brendan likes candy, I like shrimp, John likes his puréed

Clothes: Brendan likes shirts with dinosaurs on them, I like jeans and a hoodie and John likes Velvet

TV: Brendan likes Nick Jr., I like ESPN and and John likes the Hallmark Channel

Medicine: Brendan takes some when he is sick, I take a pill a day and John has the pharmacy on speed dial

Hair: Brendan hates getting his washed, I hate the dry scalp and John is just glad he has hair

Christmas: Brendan loves the presents, I love the down time and John loves when all the grandkids go home

Memory: Brendan remembers everything, I cant remember what I had for breakfast and John has forgotten more than the rest of us know

Sex: Not going there

Music: Brendan likes Go fish, I like 80s and 90s music and John likes Perry Como

Offspring: Brendan - playbuddies, Me - five boys, really? John - too many to remember their names

All kidding aside I have no issues hitting forty and I hope I can be half as healthy and active as John when I hit 80! He is a good man and a great father-in-law and grandpa!

My favorite Christmas gift!

So my favorite Christmas gift this year was a safe family after a near tragic accident on our way home from an Illinois visit with family. We were only going about 35 mph because of bad snow when we entered a white out and suddenly we saw a load of tailights in front of us.  There was no choice for us but to go into the ditch. We missed several other cars in the ditch and almost flipped the van. Fortunately the van went up on two wheels and then hit and embankment and went back right side up. The entire time we were sliding Patsy and I were both asking Jesus for protection (out loud). This made an impression on Blake and Tanner!

The driver's side took the brunt of the damage. This photo was taken before we were towed out.

Here is the newspaper report of the day (the policeman who helped us told us there were 40 cars in the slide-off)

20 vehicle crash cleared at I-94 near Van Buren/Berrien county line
By Kathy Jessup | Kalamazoo Gazette -
January 01, 2010, 6:20PM
UPDATE — The vehicles involved in a chain-reaction accident that may have involved up to 20 vehicles has been cleared from eastbound Interstate-94 near the Van Buren/Berrien county line before 6 p.m. Friday, police officials reported.


VAN BUREN COUNTY — As many as 20 vehicles may be involved in a chain-reaction, slide-and-crash snarl on eastbound Interstate-94 near the Van Buren/Berrien county line Friay afternoon.

Early reports from officials at the Michigan State Police post in Paw Paw said they know of no fatalities or serious injuries. Traffic, however, is slow as police and tow trucks untangle vehicles.

State police patrolling southwest Michigan roads are reporting varying visibility across the area as lake-effect snow bands create near white-out conditions in some locations, while other areas are reported clear.

Streets and highways are reported to be snow-covered and slippery throughout the area today and law enforcement is encouraging drivers to slow down and leave adequate stopping distance between vehicles.



After we came to a stop, firs thing we did was turn around and see if the boys were OK. They were, and all had their seatbelts on. Brendan was the first to comment of the event by saying "I didn't like that."

2 broken legs

I recently heard a mother of young children fantasizing about having two broken legs and how wonderful that would be. As I sat and listened to her, I found myself grinning like an idiot, because I too have had such daydreams. In fact, as I looked around the room full of mothers, I noticed that all of them seemed to relate to this fantasy. We laughed about it, and then we all divulged our guilty little secrets to each other. One of these woman had recently had a minor surgery and was explaining how much she had looked forward to being in the hospital for an enforced recovery period. I, myself, have often wondered if the reason I agreed to have a second child was because of my mothering instinct, or my need for the relative relaxation of the hospital room. Sure, you are only served ice chips and jello, but at least you don't have to prepare it. No one requests that you get out of bed and do some laundry. The nurses don't ask you if you can help them find things, and sweetest of all....YOU control the remote on the TV! OK, so the choices on the television are usually pretty lame, but the power to control those lame channels is all yours!


Until this time, I had often wondered if I was the only strange and twisted woman who would choose to go through this pain in order to completely relax. Now, I realize just how wide spread this goes. There didn't seem to be many mothers in the room that couldn't relate. And that started me wondering.....do Dad's ever dream of being laid up in bed? Then they wouldn't have to cook, help with homework, do laundry, clean the toilets...OK. I've answered my own question haven't I? No, they don't! But, I think Dads may be on to something here. Maybe (and I do mean maybe), in some small way they are smarter than we are. I mean, let's look at this in depth. Let's say your child is leaving the house for school in shorts and the weather is only slightly above freezing.

Mom would...

1. Scold the child for wearing inappropriate clothing and instruct them to turn around and

put something warmer on.

2.Listen to the child complain that there are no clean pants in their drawer.

3.Walk up the stairs to check the aforementioned drawer and find that there is, in fact, one pair of pants left.

4.Listen to the child whine because they HATE those pants and everybody in school will laugh at them.

5.Force the child to wear these perfectly good pants and then drag them back down the stairs crying and pouting.

6.Listen for the phone all day because she knows that when her child left the house, they were in such a bad temper they will probably do something at school that will get them in trouble.

7. Meanwhile, she does 6 loads of laundry to help her feel better about the humiliation she is now convinced her child is suffering.

That is what Mom would do. Now, let's take a little peek at how Dad would handle this...

“See ya later, son! Have a good one!” At which point he would turn back to Mom and say, “What? He's wearing a coat.” See what I mean? Is Dad really smarter than we are?

Now I am not advocating that we all act like Dads. I believe firmly that God created woman because he knew man could never find his keys by himself. But, I am wondering if some of the stress that we moms experience could be avoided. And just so we are clear on this point as well, I am not of the opinion that breaking both our legs would be a very good thing. I have on occasion been laid up in bed for a day or two and my husband has jumped right in to help around the house. He is a very good man. However, he is a very poor housekeeper. Of course he maintains that I am just too picky when it comes to the house. And maybe I am, since I like made beds, flushed toilets, clean dishes, appropriately cooked food, etc. Silly me!

No, what I propose is that we take just a single page from the book on “How to Be a Great Man”. I would like to experiment with the page that tells dads how to come home from a hard day at work and completely ignore the problems of the household while they take a little time to unwind. What is it about Dad that allows him to drop whatever he is carrying in his hands onto the kitchen table that is half set for dinner, step over the “oops” that the family pet left on the floor, turn a deaf ear on the whining child that has been driving Mom crazy for the past hour and settle himself comfortably on the couch with the television remote in his hand. It is a source of amazement and frustration that he is completely unaware of the chaos he has returned to at the end of his day. And I must admit, the ability that man has to look up with complete sincerity on his face and say things like, “Do you need my help, Honey?” has left me speechless on more than one occasion. This guilt-free ability to walk through a mine-field of family turbulence and relax is a talent that most women would pay dearly to possess.

There are days when I am so tired by the time the children are in bed that my feet are literally throbbing and I am ready to drop. Yet, to my utter dismay, I find myself unable to relax until the pillows are put back on the couch, the shoes are picked up off the floor and the toys are at least piled into a corner instead of strewn about the room. Only then can I sit down with my husband for a few relaxing moments before bed. WHY?!?! Men, I don't know how you do it, but if someone figures out a way to bottle this relaxation technique and sell it, they would make a fortune. Yes, the awful truth is that for some of us, the ability to completely unwind will only come about in a sterile hospital room (or possibly a padded one). Dads, in this instance, I have to admit, I have “daddy-envy”. But, don't get too proud of yourselves. You still have to work on other areas like the toilet seat, bodily function noises, morning breath, the inability to deal with pain and maniacal driving.

Halloween costumes 09

Always something

Well, it's always something,” as Rosanne Rosanadana would say. (OK, so now you know my little secret... I used to watch Saturday Night Live way “back in the day”.) Anyway, that little phrase that Rosanne used to conclude her news segment has come back to me on an almost daily basis since becoming a mother. This lastest instance involved our 4 year old son. (It seems that quite a lot of these little issues involve him....I wonder why.)
Our family recently moved from the US to Canada. That meant a lot of changes for us. One of those changes was finding a new family doctor. Let me stop right here and make one thing perfectly clear...I am in no way promoting, or bashing Canadian healthcare. It is different from the way healthcare is run in the US (not better, not worse, just different). All systems will have their positive and negative aspects. Since I am used to the system in the US, I was simply a little unprepared for finding a new doctor in Canada, that's all. We were informed by good friends that one of the first things we needed to do when coming to this country was to find a family doctor and put our names in. That sounded very reasonable to a mother of boys who seemed to enjoy infections and injuries, so that is what we did. We called a new clinic that was just opening up and asked to have our family records transferred. They told us they would put us on the waiting list and call us when it was our turn to meet the doctor. Being from the US, I thought that was kind of cute...we would get to “meet” the doctor. They said we would probably be called into the office by September. I smiled and managed to convince myself that there would surely be no need for a doctor between June and September. I wish my 4 year old had understood this as well.
You have to understand that this child was brought into our home with double ear infections and has been in a constant battle with his ears ever since. He has had two sets of tubes put in and we have our own supply of prescription ear drops for him. Now, I am not one of those mothers who advocate over medicating your children. But, when our little man smiles at me and says those magic words, “Mommy, my ear is coming out..” it means one of two things. Either, he has a clear fluid draining out of his ear and it will be gone within 48 hours, or he has a slight draining and he will be up all night spiking a 106 temperature with a ruptured ear drum by morning. (He doesn't believe in giving us a lot of warning when it comes to medical emergencies.) Anyway, that is the reason we have the prescription ear drops. Our family doctor was kind enough to order them for us before we left the US in case we needed them before we could find a new family doctor.
Well, September came and went and we had still not gotten a call from our new doctor. The ear drops were running low and I was starting to panic. I know it seems like a silly thing to panic about, but all you mothers know what it means to have to stay up all night with a sick child. Not only are you deprived of a night of sleep, you are also subjected unending whining and crying through out that night. Then you realize as the sun slowly starts to rise, this child is feeling no better and now you are so tired no amount of coffee will take the edge off your utter exhaustion. Your husband will soon be waking and possibly complaining about his interrupted night's sleep. And as he leaves the house for work that morning, you find yourself crying and asking why he gets to leave the house and not you....in fact, you might even be surprised to find yourself stamping your feet in anger and yelling, “It's not fair!!” (OK, so maybe I'm the only one who throws temper tantrums when I am tired. Let's just forget I mentioned it.) Anyway, I was panicking.
By October, I was wondering if possibly we had somehow missed the doctor's call and had lost our place on the waiting list. (OK, so I am neurotic. Haven't you figured that out by now?) Anyway, my husband finally placed a call to the clinic to check and see if we were still scheduled to see the doctor and he was kindly informed that we were on the list, but our meeting was now scheduled for November. My blood ran cold. November!?!?! I was absolutely certain we would be out of ear drops before that! This was a tiny little bottle! Really tiny! That is the only excuse I can offer for what happened next. It wasn't exactly a lie....it was more like a grabbing a life preserver as you head out to sea in a leaky boat.
The nurse said she felt bad for making us wait that long if someone was really sick. I guess it all depends on how you define “really sick”, but I took that to mean “can't wait until November”. Anyway, we now had the one needed appointment. My son would be able to see the doctor a week from Wednesday. My heart felt so much lighter that even the load of guilt I felt at the slight deception seemed of no consequence. I kept telling myself that all mothers call a doctor for a sick child, get the appointment and then find that as soon as they are ready to take that child to said appointment, the child miraculously shows no signs of sickness. With a jury of my peers (which would have to include at least one mother) I would never be convicted. Of course, I also prayed for an ear infection before the appointment. Of course, God, in His infinite justice, decided to keep my son's ears clear that whole week. So, I did the only thing any self-respecting mother would do....I sent my husband with my son to his doctor's appointment. I figured the whole office was going to know my son wasn't really sick, but maybe if they didn't actually see my face, they wouldn't connect me with the “fake” visit when we had to make later “real” visits. (I know what you are thinking, but I was weak...and my husband is a much stronger individual than I am.)
Anyway, Wednesday came and I stomped down all my guilt feelings as I watched my husband and well child drive off to the doctor's office. I busied myself around the house doing extra house work, and telling myself I would make it up to my husband later. I was therefore, faintly surprised when my son didn't come back from his appointment as soon as I had expected. In fact, the phone call that I received from my husband telling me they were in the Canadian equivalent of an emergency room, came as a complete shock. It seems that though my son's ears were relatively clear, there was a question of a foreign object that couldn't be removed from his nose. I can't begin to tell you the thoughts that ran through my mind as I waited for the next hour and a half. What would they find up my son's nose? And would it be incriminating for myself and my husband? Was it a result of our poor parenting skills? Was it a judgement from God? Such was my guilt over the whole situation that I barely contemplated the probability that my son was the main cause of the problem.
Finally, the phone rang and my husband said one of the doctors thought that the object might be one of his ear tubes that had somehow dislodged and worked it's way into his nose. They were going to freeze his nose so they could try to remove it. Now, I was really panicked. How did a tube get from your ear to your nose? What had I done to cause this medical emergency? Why hadn't I seen the symptoms before this? Was this all the result of forcing him to eat the green beans that he said would “make him sick” the week before?
My husband soon came home with a smiling 4 year old and a small plastic bag in his hand. What was it? A Lego. Yes, a Lego. My husband said that after several doctors had examined the situation, finally one came in and said, “Why don't we just ask him to blow his nose?” It seems that after a few significant blows, the Lego worked it's way to the end of my son's nose and was retrieved relatively unharmed. Smilingly, my little boy said, “Mommy, I sneezed and a Lego came out of my nose!” He is so proud. I on the other hand, must admit that I feel a mixture of shame and relief. I am ashamed of my part in this farce that was played out in our new doctor's office, but on the other hand, at least I have not been branded as an “over-protective mother who sees illnesses where there are none”. I am now proudly baring the title of “careless mother who leaves inappropriately small toys around for her little ones to play with”. I can live with that. As Rosanne would say, “It's always something, if it's not a major ear infection...it's a Lego up the nose.”

Happy 14th Baby!

Can you see her though my eyes?

Ode to a Lego

I think that I shall never know
The awesome power of the tiny Lego.
Why doest Thou bring the young such joy?
Is there some chemical imbalance in each girl and boy?

OK, enough bad verse. But I have to admit, I don't quite understand the strange attraction in this little piece of plastic. Now, don't get me wrong. I do not have any ill feelings towards the Lego itself. In fact, I will go so far as to say that I rather enjoy building a little house out of them now and then. And I did participate in building and racing my own Lego car a few weeks ago at the Lego store with my sons. (Yes, I won! I don't believe in letting someone else win when my skills are obviously superior. I think it builds a false sense of accomplishment. Let no one accuse me of building my childrens' self esteem on a false foundation.) Back to the Lego. It is a wonderful toy that stimulates the imagination and is so versatile that it can be transformed into almost anything. This goes without question. I see it's attraction, I just can't believe the strength of that attraction. My oldest son, for the first time, has a bedroom of his own. His own private sanctuary. A place to retire when life (and parents) are so unfair. A place of solitude from the crazy life he shares with his brothers. In short, a refuge. However, he has willingly given all that away in order to build a place of security for his Lego creations. Yes, he is once again sharing a bedroom with his younger brother and has turned his room into “THE LEGO ROOM”.
The need to store his Legos securely began when his 3 and 4 year old brothers developed a strange need to carry small Lego men in their pockets. Since they did not own any small Lego men, they of course “borrowed” their older brothers. Strangely, even after they got small Lego men of their own, they still continued to “borrow” from their big brothers. In fact, the “borrowing” continued through disciplines too numerous to mention. The final battle ended with a Sponge Bob Square Pants Lego man circling the bowl before being launched into the depths of the septic tank forever. Now, as sad as it was to see Sponge Bob go down, I had no intention of digging up the septic tank to retrieve him, as my son suggested. Though we replaced the entire Sponge Bob set, the need to keep his Legos safe sat heavily on my son's mind. He would run to the bathroom any time he heard the toilet flush and ask, “What did you just put down there?” He would stand guard in front of his bedroom door when his little brothers were playing in the room across the hall. If he was the first one awake in the morning, he would wake his youngest brothers and make them follow him downstairs while he ate breakfast. He admitted to have nightmares about Legos going down the toilet.
Believe me, my son David is the world's greatest flusher. In fact, I firmly believe that if flushing improbable objects down the toilet was an Olympic sport, my son would certainly be a gold medallist. We will never truly know the depths of his flushing accomplishments. The things that have been retrieved before the point of no return are many. The number of things that have been written off with no chance of resurrection are far greater. However, the unusually high percentage of things that are “missing in action” around our house, leads me to speculate as to the true capacity of our septic tank. So, I do share my eldest's frustration with his little brother's habits. In fact, I have on occasion, been tempted to run into the bathroom myself after hearing a flush and demand, “What did you just put down there?” However, I have yet to succumb.
Yet, toothbrushes, dog toys, underwear and the countless other objects that have taken “the big swirl” are not as traumatic as watching a Lego hit the drain to the dark depths. Our family was on high alert for several days before we came up with the Lego Shrine solution. Not only has my son given his room in protection of the tiny toy, but we have also installed a locking doorknob on said room. Oh yes, even Dad was willing to shell out the bucks to buy a new doorknob in order to restore peace in our home once again.
I do have to admit that the room does hold some attractions for me that I had not thought of earlier. For once, I can confidently walk into my sons room at night to close a window, or retrieve a lost cup without the pain and agony of countless little Legos adorning the bottom of my feet. Also the words, “clean your room” are no longer a source of horror for the boys. (I have not been brave enough to utter the words “clean the Lego room” yet.) As strange as it may be, the Lego room has been a good solution to our family crisis. However, I still have a hard time understanding the depth of devotion it takes to give up your own private bedroom for the sake of a toy. My understanding will probably never reach that level. I am still grappling with the age old question of whether Lego sets were meant to be built and then kept together to be played with, or whether they are to be built and taken apart to be re-built into numerous other creations. That's one argument I have no intention of trying to sort out. It will take far greater minds than mine.

When It's NOT OK to laugh as a Mommy

All Moms know that there are times when your children make you smile warmly and there are times when they make you giggle with joy. But there are times when they do funny things and you are not allowed to laugh. It's in the Mommy Rule Book. It's easy to spot some of

these "unlaughable moments" like when your pre-adolesent falls down over his own feet. Or your large dog knocks your toddler over. The rule book clearly states that Moms are not supposed to laugh at their children's pain. We are supposed to give comfort and sympathy, not share in their humiliation. That's the easy part. But then, there are the harder moments...



These moments seem to lurk on the edge of our total frustration. In other words, they occur when we should be at our angriest. I believe that we have a built in release valve that kicks in once our children have sent us over the edge. My theory is that our children have the capability to make us so angry we will literally explode. So God caused Moms to have a laughter reaction that releases some of the pent up negative energy that leads to physical explosion. OK, it's just a theory. There is no other way to account for the need to laugh when I should be at my "Mom's on the War Path" best.



Recently, my two youngest children were told to clean their room and put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket. They are 3 and 4 years old. This should not have been too difficult for them. Pull a comforter over their wrinkled sheets and put dirty PJs into a football shaped clothes hamper. I was pretty sure they could do the job, but was expecting the worst. Or so I thought.... My idea of the worst was blankets on the floor and PJs under the pillows. Imagine my surprise when I walked into a room that had no clothes on the floor and blankets pulled up on the beds. Then imagine my confusion when I realized there were no pillows on the beds, no pillows under the beds, no pillows in the closet, in fact no pillows at all. I walked over to the clothes hamper to view their dirty jammies neatly piled into the football. Again, I was surprised to see no pillows in the hamper, and no jammies either. In fact, the football hamper was completely empty. I gave my two little men a very stern look and said, "Where are the dirty clothes boys?" Chase gave me a sweet little smile and said, "I show you Mommy." Then he took my hand and led me to the front yard. There, piled in the bushes under their bedroom window, lay the missing pillows, dirty clothes, odd assortment of toys and stuffed animals and books. Oh, did I mention it was raining at the time?



Silly me! I was wondering if they had the capability to make their beds and put their clothes away. I should have known that removing a screen from the window, tossing every loose article out the 2nd story window, replacing the screen and making their bed was well within their ability. I should have know this since they had already shown a remarkable ability to sneak into their big brother's rooms and come out with a large assortment of lego men stuffed neatly into their pockets, all without seemingly being anywhere near their brother's bedrooms.



As I tried to come up with a punishment that seemed fitting for this latest behavior problem, I started to think about what would happen if they had leaned too far out the window and fallen. That was all it took! Anger and fear seemed to rise from the base of my feet and threatened to completely engulf me. That's when I developed my exploding theory. I have no other excuse for what happened next. I was standing in the rain, in the middle of my front yard, with my two youngest sons at my side and when I should have been developing my "Mommy Look" and devising terrible consequences for them, I felt the overwhelming need to laugh. I don't have to explain this feeling to any Mom; we have all been there at least once. I ran into the house with a shouted "Get this stuff back in the house this minute young man!" and hid in my room until I was once again under control. Luckily, my abrupt departure was interpreted as overwhelming anger by my sons and they immediately started to correct the situation. Luckily, my husband arrived home just about the time they finished bringing wet clothes, toys, pillows and books into the house. It seems he did not possess the anger release laughter valve. He was not only able, but willing to give them the discipline they needed and do it all without laughter.



I'll have to find his secret for non-laughter soon, since I just told my 3 year old to "get your tail up to your room this minute" and he turned to me and said very sweetly "Mommy, only dinosaurs have tails."

Life in Canada so far

Two weeks and change in Canada so far at our new church and new home and new church home. Life during a move is crazy and leaves little room for time to blog! But for my own sake and the sake of posterity I am making myself sit down and share some random thoughts on moving our of the US and into another nation.

• Still getting used to milk in a bag, two dollar coins, gas by the liter and front page hockey news


• hundreds of words that are a bit different here, not just pop and soda


• life on the farm has been great - so peaceful
  
• Forward is such a friendly church, so very welcoming


• I sense a greater peace in my life and less stress than I have in probably a decade


• Back to Chicago style driving


• My role is shifting (and needed to shift) from being Marty the pastor to the kids to Marty the pastor to the parents and volunteers. This means some letting go for and some embracing some change I have longed for. I think this would have been too much a move for me, the kids, the volunteers and parents in Roanoke.


• Patsy gets to be involved in worship and children's ministry here! She has such a beautiful voice if you have ever heard her sing (sorry Parkway folks but you missed out!). She chose kids over the glory of sanctuary praise for the last six years and I will always admire her for that - her example of choosing the humble things to confound the wise.


• So far not having TV has been amazing! Not sure if we will do it forever. Patsy and I have tons of black and white movies and we have watched some of them and the boys have some DVDs they have watched. We take more walks, play more family games and now have a garden! But there will come a time when the Bears start playing. Honestly I have not missed seeing the Cubs. I do listen to an ESPN station out of Buffalo in the car though.


• I think I may have a queen now?


• There are some great passionate, committed people at Foward involved in Chidlren's Ministries.


• The farm we rent has like eight horses and a llama named Bob.


• Blake and Tanner are slowly meeting friends. There are some neighbor boys who invited them over to swim! Tanner won suckers for his age group in church so he was a big hit.


• I got a really nice portable computer for work and a Blackberry for my new phone.


• David and Chase are doig wonderful and love the big yard and big house to run around in.


• Still trying to sell our house. The sale fell through the second time. Still have peace.

Well that's good for now! We miss all our friends and the kids at PWC! God bless.

160, 16 and 1

Sorry I haven't posted for awhile. Moving, adopting, showing the house, applying for passports and all that you know. So let me sum up the last three months in 160 words16 pictures and 1 video

Last night of Awana lost an Oreo eating contest and had my picture in the paper.

Baptised 12 kids on May 3rd.

Mother's Day

Family portrait session

Redid two ceilings and dropped the price of our house. Sold it finally!

God provided a farm house for us to rent in Canada until we find our home

David turned 4!

Visited the Moberlys in Aurora

Creation science Museum in Cincinnati

Bounce town with the Moberlys

Breakfast at Machine Shed with Grandpa and Grandma

Grandma March's 84th birthday in Rockford

Romantic getaway to Biltmore turned into a special time with sicky Chase

Patsy and Gloria painted the jungle scenes in the Kid Kove Jr. area

Blake earned the Timothy Award in Awana

Easter!

Chase turns three

Patsy and the boys star on the big screen

Patsy was recruited to be in an intro video for a sermon series Parkway did called God's Drive Thru window