Thursday, January 31, 2008

Twice adopted

I just finished reading a great book by Michael Reagan called Twice Adopted. Michael is the adopted son of President Reagan and actress Jane Wyman. I read this book for three reasons. 1. We will soon be adoptive parents and I wanted to know more forma first hand perspective the child's view on adoption, 2. I love and work with kids and I love to know more about the challenges all kids face and 3. I am a fan of President Reagan and I was interested in this personal side of his life as well as hearing Michael's faith journey Christ brought him on.
So what did I get from this incredible book? A few highlights:

  • I think its better to be honest with adoptive children and celebrate their adoption and try to answer questions they have. Keep the open communciation lines flowing. It's about them and not the parent so don't be threatened by the birth family or the child's interest.

  • God can use all our circumstances to bring glory to Him and healing for us if we let Him.

  • That too many times great men don't know how to be great men to those they need to be the greatest to!

  • Michael was sexually abused and exploited as an eight year child by a after school care worker, and never told anyone for over 30 years. He gives us as churches, schools and youth organizations some great ideas in protecting our children agaisnt predators. Many we have in place. You know what though, the people who give me the hardest times about these - some parents. Parents when I have a numbered check-in system, when I do background checks on all volunteers, when I send the 13 year old away and don't let them pick-up your child and when I ask you to pick your children up at certain doors and to keep the outside doors closed - it's because I care about your kids. This is a much more common problem than any of us want to know. As one children's pastor I know tells his parents - don't make me care more about your kids than you! It may not take a village to raise a child but it takes us all to keep them safe. (Sorry for the soap box but I am passionate about this!).

  • That God can use an adult child to bring healing in a family. Sometimes as adult children we have to be the ones to reach out the hand of love to a parent.

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